an adventurous weekend...

Ok so Saturday was quite the adventure. I got to hike up Pacaya, one of the active volcanoes nearby with a few of the girls from my language school. There are so many words I could use to describe it. Wow. Ok so we went up in a group of 14 and a tour guide. It was quite a difficult climb. The altitude we were hiking at, combined with the steepness of the trail made it pretty tough. We didn’t go at too fast of a pace though because many of us were kinda out of shape. :) I was told it was a little less than one and a half miles one way, but I feel like that might have been wrong. It felt longer than that. So we went through a wooded area first and that was kinda lame because everything was dead looking. Then we got to the lava ash where we could see the peak, which had smoke coming out of it(SO COOL!). Lava ash is like walking in sand but with the effect of walking in dirt, it came up as dust and was awful to breath in. we definitely had the taste of it in our mouths. Nasty… The lava ash was also very difficult to walk uphill in, 2 steps forward one step back. It was steep and very tiring. Then we got to the lava rock and it was really steep. Some of the rocks were loose so we had to be careful and slow going up. As we got higher we could feel that some of the rocks were warmer, which was cool. Then we got to the top of where we climbed and it was miserably hot. We were standing on a few very large rocks and you could see the lava under them, pretty freaky. And it was so hot in that spot that it was hard to breath and my shoes started melting on the bottom. So we quickly wanted down from there. I didn’t get to roast marshmallows but when I was up there that was the last thing on my mind. It was quite beautiful up there though. We were above the clouds and could see the other 3 volcanoes and the sun setting. It was so beautiful. I loved that part so much. So anyways then we had to make the trek back down :(. We had to come down the way we went up, which was super hard and scary, especially since it was getting dark(we had flashlights thankfully). There was a lot of scooting on our bottoms and just kinda sliding down. And once we were at the spot where we could see the peak really well, lava started flowing down the side. Don’t worry it wasn’t near where we were. It was running in a completely different direction. But it was really cool to be able to see it running. Oh and when you looked at the smoke from the peak, it was red where it met the peak because of the lava, that was pretty cool. I was pretty relieved when we finally made it back to the van. I emptied lava ash out of my shoes like 4 or 5 times that day. Ha ha. Oh and now I'm really sore from the climb…ugh I'm out of shape...

Ok so language school is going good. I still get frustrated. I wish I could just be fluent in Spanish. My life would be easier. I've been getting lots of sleep here. I can't go out after dark because its dangerous and it gets dark at like 6 so I usually go to bed pretty early. Getting the sleep is good though, I like that :) plus I have had a ton of time to read, which is great. I have finished reading 2 books already since I've been here. :) I've been having some good times with the Lord. The isolation has been enjoyable, but hard at times.

As I see the homeless people in the streets here, I just don’t know what to do. I hate just walking past them, but I don’t know how to help them. It breaks my heart to see them. To see the sadness in their eyes…

a real update :)

Ok so I'm really not sure what all I have shared so far so I'm pretty much just gonna start over and share lots right now because I don’t have internet as I write this so sorry if I repeat things I already wrote.

Last week was pretty relaxing for me. They just had me chilling mostly and doing whatever. There was a team here when I first came and I really liked them. They helped me to adjust easier than I think I would have. I helped them with their laying of cinder blocks for a patio area, which was pretty hard. The blocks each weighed like 15 lbs they said. And I was moving wheel barrels with like 10 at a time. (I didn’t know they were that heavy til after). I was quite surprised. I was moving more than I weigh lol. Anyway I also got to spend time with the kids, which was a lot of fun but also frustrating because I couldn’t really say anything to them. I watched TV with the older guys one evening which was cool I guess. Oh yeah, um their names are all really hard to remember. There are so many to remember! I think once I'm with them more and actually able to talk to them it will be better. Saturday the team left, which was pretty hard. A lot harder than I thought it would be, that’s for sure. It was the first time I was really alone and it kinda scared me a little but I am beginning to like having time alone.

Then Sunday afternoon Wendy(she and her husband, Kendon, are the directors) and Jon(um he is complicated :) he is in his 20s and still lives there but he is in school and also works at the children's home. He also speaks fluent English which is great!). Anyways, they brought me to Antigua(for language school for 5 weeks), which is probably the most beautiful place I think I have ever been. All the streets are cobblestone and the houses and buildings are all weird cool colors, like mustard yellow, orange, bright blue, red, and variations of that. It was really scary when they left after taking me to my host family's house. My family doesn’t speak any English which is hard, but its good for me. I was overwhelmed with being left here, but the Lord has been my comfort and has brought me joy.

Monday I started language school. I have one-on-one teaching from 8-12. I like it, its hard though and frustrating sometimes. My teacher is really great though. Monday I also got to feel a tremor(mini earthquake), which was SWEET! Haha they said it was like a 7. I was on the roof/deck thing with my teacher so we could see and of course feel the building move. It was pretty intense. I was kinda scared but I'm glad I experienced it :). Ok this is my analogy for you on how it felt. Think about one of those handheld vibrating massagers and like putting it on yourself. Ok then you turn it off but it still kinda feels like its there vibrating you. Ha ha. Its like someone put a giant one of those on the earth. Quite intense.

Food: ok I am drinking way more coffee than usual. I had 4 cups/day the past 2 days. haha It’s a social thing here so its hard not to. Oh but I can drink it black now. Haha. Yes I have been here for only a week and I am already drinking my coffee black. Crazy right. Um I really miss food from home. Last night I was eating dinner and I just wanted a good home-cooked meal. I miss good food… no mi gustan frijoles… :( I don’t like beans...

Almost done I promise! Um my neighbors in Antigua is a gym. So its super annoying because they play music ALL THE TIME! Ugh! Um, Antigua is super safe. It’s a tourist town. So its actually safe for me to walk alone(unlike the children's home where I can't leave). But don’t worry I'm super careful! And I don’t go out after dark. That is just not safe.

What the Lord is teaching me so far: SO MUCH! But I think the main theme of what He is teaching me is to surrender EVERYTHING to Him. To rely on him for my every need. Sacrifice. That’s a word that I feel He is showing me. He has asked me to make a lot of sacrifices in being here. Many of which I didn’t really think about til in the midst. He is also teaching me that life isn't always comfortable following Him, but its worth it.

HE deserves all the glory for everything I do. I desire to live in a way that when others look at me, they know I cannot be this person. But it is only through Him and His strength that I am who I am.

all i want to say is that it is really hard to figure my blog out right now because my computer apparently knows i'm in Guatemala because it is all in spanish! but i think i finally know how to do it haha.

the language barrier is really hard for me. i am getting really frustrated because i just want to talk to the kids! but a verse was shared with me that i would like to put on here. its 1 John 3:18 and it says, "Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth." so although i cant talk to them I can still love them.

settling in

I don't have much time to talk right now but I wanted to give an update on how the first few days are going. It is absolutely beautiful here. The weather is sunny and mostly warm(the wind makes it a little chilly at times). I am also surrounded by mountains, which I LOVE. It is just beautiful.

Apparently Guatemala City is quite dangerous, so we have cement walls around us and we have 24 hour guards at the gates(and they have guns! which is perfectly legal... :) ) so i haven't really left the campus but thats ok.

I am finding myself remembering my spanish(which isnt very much) and sometimes i am even thinking in spanish haha well the few words i know!

The children are adorable and I love being here. I haven't had a ton of interaction with them yet but I look forward to loving on them and spending lots of time with them.

well i really have to go but I will try to update again soon. I leave for Antigua for language school on Sunday and will be there until February 19th. I'm not sure of internet access there but I will do my best! :)

its almost here

As my time to leave draws near, I am filled with excitement. Yet at the same time I am so nervous. My mind is filled with thoughts of antisipation as I'm still not 100% sure what to expect yet. I am so excited for the things the Lord is going to do in me though while I am there. I want to be used by Him, and I desire my life to be completely for His glory, not my own. I'm not sure I could ever do this without Him guiding me and carrying me every step of the way. I look forward to the challenges I face ahead, as well as just being in this new season of my life.

I have a few things that I desire to see happen in my life while I am there. One thing I desire is to rest in the Lord completely in who I am and what He wants me to do with my life. Deut. 33:12 says, "Let the beloved of the Lord rest secure in him, for he shields him all day long, and the one the Lord loves rests between his shoulders." and Psalm 46:10 says, "Be still, and know that I am God..." I desire to take these 2 verses and live them out completely in my life. I think this is the season I am in. To rest secure in the Lord. To be still and know He is God. To stop striving to become better, to stop trying so hard. I think when I stop and rest in the Lord, when I stand still before the Lord, I will truly see God. I will learn His heart. Learn who He is. And I think that that is when I will become the person I desire to be. Not in striving, but in looking to God. So that is one thing I desire not only for my time in Guatemala but for my year, and furthermore for my life.
I also desire that God would be glorified in all my actions. I desire to love people the way Jesus loved. I desire to serve. And I desire that I would put others first.

I leave in 6 days. I ask that you would pray for me. For my time in Guatemala. For the children of NLCH. That I could love them like Jesus. That my life would portray Jesus to them. That their hearts would be filled with hope and love.

The next time I write I will be in Guatemala. :)